Effectively managing periods of change in your life

Do you ever experience a sense of frustration when attempting to achieve something new in life because the change is not occurring quick enough? You know what I mean...you want to change careers and halfway through the three year study program you just want to finish, you're halfway through a fitness program and just want to get to the end and see results, you have financial goals and just want to reach that hard number...

For many of us, the goal itself is what we focus on; the new job/career/relationship etc without considering two very important things. The first is asking ourselves what we have done up to that point in time to expect that goal to be achieved at a faster rate then what is curently is and the second is to ask whether it is realistic to achieve a goal (assumably important)without working through a process first. Travelling for a year then expecting a great job, with plenty of money in the bank is a great wish but again but is the basis for this assumption in the first place?

Frustration,stress, anger...all negative emotions evolving from a life change or decision to make a life change is that your personal values have shifted in an instant to something new however your life experiences cannot be altered at that pace and take time to catchup. The time between when you change your life values and align your day to day life is the period where you will experience those negative emotions if you focus on the fact that you have not achieved your goal or living the life you wish.

An ex coaching mentor of mine told me once to focus on the process not the goal because you can control the former but not the latter - what I figured out is that negative emotions arise from when you lose control and positive emotions from when you can control events around you. So the secret to managing life change is to (1) plan ahead and have an idea of your 'life road map' and (2) ensure you do what it takes to make you achieve the goal every single day and (3) reinforce the belief that if you continue the process everyday then you will achieve your goal and there are no shortcuts in this.

People will generally give every excuse for not achieving a goal in an attempt to make themselves feel better. The truth is it will not and regret in hindsight is not a pretty emotion to experience. The fact of the matter is that the goals weren't achieved because the process needed to reach that target were not completed - it is as simple as that.